By Natalie Clark
How to help your child through a tragedy
Tracey Bratton, LCSW
School shootings have become a major worry for children and youth across the nation. It’s important to keep the lines of communication open with your child to help him/her feel safe and secure when tragedy strikes. They look to you for this felt safety already, and it becomes even more important at these uncertain times.
Here are a few tips for staying connected with your child through traumatic events:
- Open, honest, age-appropriate communication
- Talk at key times –during commuting, dinner or at bedtime
- Ask them how they are dealing with the news –don’t wait on them to talk about it
- When they’re communicating their feelings. thoughts, concerns, etc., actively listen without interrupting
- Validate and normalize their feelings
- If they have misinformation, gently, but honestly correct them
- Console them with a hug and let them know they are safe
- Ensure your child feels safe
- Make sure home is a safe haven and a comfort to your child
- Watch your child for changes in mood and/or behaviors
- Fear, anxiety, grief, increased stress
- Changes in appetite and/or sleep, nightmares
- Difficulty concentrating on school/homework
- Ensure your child is not over-exposing himself/herself with news reports, internet searches, etc. about the traumatic event
- Model self-care for your child
- To take care of your child, you will need to take good care of yourself
- Keep routine schedules
- Make time for exercise and fun family activities
These are just a few tips for helping your child through a traumatic event. If you or your child feel stuck, reach out to your support system and talk to a close friend, relative, or pastor. If you’re overwhelmed and your daily routine is disrupted, it may be a good idea to consult with a mental health professional.